A Letter to My Girls

To all the ladies in my life,

Yesterday was Valentine's Day, and many of you are single like I am. This can often be a difficult day for "all the single ladies". It feels even worse sometimes if you've had a valentine before, but you don't this year. Trust me, I know. Today a very insightful friend pointed out that for many of us girls, we plan these massive girls nights to have a blast and prove our independence and that we don't need a guy in our life, but often it's really a pity party on the inside. But I just want you all to remember some very important things.

God is in control. No matter what is going on in your life, He does have a plan (Psalm 37:23). If you daily seek His face and ask for His will and are obedient, you're exactly where you need to be. If that means you're in a relationship with a great guy, that is amazing! If it means that you're single right now, or experiencing a recent breakup, or heartache of feelings not reciprocated, that is amazing too. Even though it may sting a bit right now, God truly does have a plan. I'm not going to sit here and tell you that every single one of you who desires a relationship or marriage will have it someday. I can't promise that. But God has a plan for each of our lives and He will fulfill that plan. If you're alive and breathing and if you have salvation, you already have more than you deserve. God pours out blessings on His people. He gives us what we need (Philippians 4:19).

As cliche as these verses can sound, we find incredible truths in them (don't let the Bible become cliche, friends): "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6). Trust God. Don't lean on your understanding (but on His). Acknowledge Him in all that you do. HE will direct your path. Know that He is God and that He has all the power in the world and that His will is your sanctification, and it's for your best. Remember that His ways are not our ways - they are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9). We will not always understand His ways, but He's the omniscient one. He knows what He's doing. Lean on that, not your own understanding of how things "should" be.

Friday a sweet friend reminded me of this truth - God withholds no good things from those who walk uprightly (Psalm 84:11). If God withholds no good thing from us when we obey Him, and we're obeying Him, what we don't have really isn't good for us at the present time. This isn't to say that it won't be good for us to have in the future. It means that right now we are better off without the things we don't have, or else we'd have them. This may mean that I (or you, or someone else) never get the things we want from this life - our own family, security, a job we love, whatever else. But if God is withholding it, we really are better off that way. And if it's His will, one day you will have a wonderful man to celebrate every Valentine's Day with.

But for now - soak up your time as a single lady! Enjoy your friends, especially your girlfriends. Don't sweat the small things. Choose your battles. Love people as much as you can. Get involved in ministry. Get a discipler. Disciple someone else. Be an encourager to those around you. Try something new. Forgive fully every chance you get. Take adventures. Do crazy things. Be part of a small group or Bible study. Make new foods. Meet new people. Hang out with kids. Study the Bible intensely. Work hard in school. Work hard at your job. Do everything to the best of your ability. Enjoy the time and the freedom you have that may not be there when you're in a relationship.