To NOT Do:

Well, I've already shared what I'm doing over break here (tackling the reading list I was given for Children's Lit, which I'm taking next semester). But there is something else I'm doing - or rather, not doing - over break (for an indefinite period of time - maybe 'til January, maybe til break ends, maybe longer).

Let me start by saying this: I love love songs. They're so cute and they make me happy, plus they are just fun to sing along to. I also really enjoy romantic comedies, or books that include love stories, and other similar things. But over the last couple weeks I have realized that this is dangerous. It totally breeds discontentment in my current state of singleness. Don't get me wrong - I am enjoying being single. I love the time I have to spend time with sweet girlfriends and serving in my church. But when I am constantly bombarded with "love stories" and things like that, my contentment dwindles.

Another thing is this: the "love" shown in these movies/songs/books is not real. And if it does happen to be real, it's not the lasting kind of love. It's only the romantic love that is shown. But a good marriage includes more than just romantic love, because that comes and goes. It needs to have a self-sacrificial love. Husbands are commanded to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph 5:25). How did Christ love the church? He gave His life for her. This is the love that marriage must be built on. (Wives should also love their husbands this way.) Should the romantic kind of love be there? Of course! But it needs to be so much more than just that. But when people only see the romance of relationships, they develop unrealistic expectations.

Speaking of unrealistic expectations, Meredith said something that was really helpful, too. She said that in chick flicks, the man is willing to bend over backward and do whatever it takes to catch the attention of a woman. He will fight as hard as he needs to, for however long he needs to, to get the woman of his dreams. But in real life, this doesn't happen. Most guys will stop pursuing if they can see that it's clearly doing no good. (I think...I can't say that with authority because I'm, you know, not one of them.)

For these reasons, I am not going to listen to love songs (have to go through my iTunes and change the music it plays) or watch romantic comedies. I am not going to read any books that have romance stories either (not that I read many of those, but sometimes you start reading a novel and realize it's just a fatty love story). I know that I can't entirely avoid romance over break - it's not a realistic goal. And it's not what I want necessarily, either. As long as romance/a relationship is not the main focus of the movie/book, it's ok.

Why am I doing this? I don't want to have a worldly view of romance/relationships/marriage. While I'm single is a good time to take the time to think about this. If God blesses me with a husband in the future, I do not want to have unrealistic expectations of what our relationship should look like. I want my thoughts toward this to be based on truth from God's Word. I don't want it to be affected by the world's cheap ideas and definitions. The Bible says not to be conformed to this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). This is one area my mind needs renewal, so that is what I intend to do.

Growing up, I was taught that when you "put off" one thing, you must "put on" something else. So I'm "putting off" love songs, chick flicks, etc, and putting on truth. The best thing I can do in life is to know and love God more. These things can often be a distraction from God and from the truth of His Word. As I study His Word and spend time in prayer, I always learn so much about Him. And the more I know Him, the more I love Him. As I see His character, I will also see truths about marriage and things like that. I will also be more content in my singleness. Whether or not I ever marry is in the Lord's hands, and as much as I'd love to have a husband and kids someday, I know that it may not happen. I need to trust Him in this area of my life (though this is often hard). This little project is about renewing my mind. But even more than that, it is about knowing Him. He is the main focus.

Why am I posting this on my blog? It may seem like a kind of personal thing to post on the internet. But I am pretty much an open book. I enjoy sharing what God does in my life, and I know that He's already worked through this project and will continue to do so. I may post more about it as time goes on and as I learn more. But I'm not sure if I will, so if you're reading this and ever want to know how it's going, feel free to ask. Also feel free to keep me accountable in this.

I hope you all have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! And if you're on break from school, enjoy this time and be refreshed (but do not become spiritually lazy-life is a constant spiritual battle) by the time off!! Love you all.

Guard Your Heart

As a woman who has grown up in the church and in a Christian school for most of my life, the phrase "guard your heart" (Proverbs 4:23, NIV) is one I have heard many a time. Let's be honest - it's one we hear and use quite often. Single Christian girls/women are constantly reminded to guard their hearts in reference to the opposite sex. But as I was reading a blog post by someone older and wiser, I saw that this is so wrong. Look at the context of this verse in Proverbs 23:

²⁰ My son, give attention to my words; 
Incline your ear to my sayings. 
²¹ Do not let them depart from your sight; 
Keep them in the midst of your heart. 
²² For they are life to those who find them 
And health to all ^[g]their body. 
²³ Watch over your heart with all diligence, 
For from it flow the springs of life. 
²⁴ Put away from you a deceitful mouth 
And put devious ^[h]speech far from you. 
²⁵ Let your eyes look directly ahead 
And let your ^[i]gaze be fixed straight in front of you. 
²⁶ Watch the path of your feet 
And all your ways will be established. 
²⁷ Do not turn to the right nor to the left; 
Turn your foot from evil.


 (This quote is from the NASB version of the Bible. It's a different version than the previous one mentioned, and it doesn't use the words "guard your heart" specifically. This is my preferred version, but when people talk about the verse, they always use the NIV version, so I am using that specific phrase in this post...sorry if this is confusing.)

If you take a look at the context of the verse, it's not talking about romance at all. What are we to guard our hearts from? Sin. Walking with God is an active lifestyle. You must fight your sin, or it will destroy you, hence the words "guard"/"watch over" and "with all diligence". The other night I had a conversation with a sweet girl about the effects of sin. We have both watched it absolutely destroy those we love recently. It must be kept in check. If you don't destroy your sin, your sin will destroy you. This is why we must guard our hearts from it. Ultimately, our goal of guarding our hearts from sin must be out of our love and fear for God. His glory must be the driving motivator of our actions. He gets the most glory when we destroy our sins.

Note: it is important to be careful with where you place your romantic affections, and it is important to encourage others to do the same. It's also important to make sure that your thoughts, attitudes, words, actions, motives, etc. are pure in regards to relationships/romance. This just is not the verse from which to base those ideas.

Kept by God {Valley of Vision}

Jehovah God,
Thou Creator, Upholder, Proprietor of all things,
I cannot escape thy presence or control, nor do I desire to do so.
My privilege is to be under the agency of omnipotence, righteousness, wisdom, patience, mercy, grace.
Thou art love with more than parental affection;
I admire thy heart, adore thy wisdom, stand in awe of thy power, abase myself before thy purity.
It is the discovery of thy goodness alone that can banish my fear,
allure me into thy presence,
help me to bewail and confess my sins.

When I review my past guilt
and am conscious of my present unworthiness
I tremble to come to thee,
I whose foundation is in the dust,
I who have condemned thy goodness,
defied thy power,
trampled upon thy love,
rendered myself worthy of eternal death.

But my recovery cannot spring from any cause in me,
I can destroy but I cannot save myself.
Yet thou hast laid help on One that is mighty,
for there is mercy with thee,
and exceeding riches in thy kindness through Jesus.
May I always feel my need of him.
Let thy restored joy be my strength;
May it keep me from lusting after the world,
bear up heart and mind in loss of comforts,
enliven me in the valley of death,
work in me the image of the heavenly,
and give me to enjoy the first fruits of spirituality,
such as angels and departed saints know.

As I was reading in the Valley of Vision this morning, I just did not want to put it down. But I had to, and it was sad. I can't wait for break so that I can read it as long as I want to!

Wimpy Women

"Wimpy theology makes wimpy women. That’s my assumption that I bring to this evening. Wimpy theology simply does not give a woman a God that is big enough, strong enough, wise enough, and good enough to handle the realities of life in away that magnifies the infinite worth of Jesus Christ.

Wimpy theology is plagued by woman-centeredness and man-centeredness. Wimpy theology doesn’t have the granite foundation of God’s sovereignty or the solid steel structure of a great God-centered purpose for all things."

John Piper, found here.




Also, if you get a chance ladies, read this. It's old - from 1995 - and from John Piper also. It was encouraging and convicting. Definitely worth the few minutes it takes to read.

Thankfulness

"Enter His gates with thanksgiving

And His courts with praise,

Give thanks to Him, bless His name.

For the Lord is good;

His lovingkindness is everlasting

And His faithfulness to all generations."

Psalm 100:4-5

With Thanksgiving rapidly approaching, I have seen many facebook/blog posts about thankfulness and things that people are thankful for. I love it! I decided to follow suit, not for the purpose of following the crowd, but to (semi-)publicly praise God for the wonderful things He has given me.

First I wanted to look at the Psalm at the top of this post. We are to enter into the presence of God with thanksgiving and praise, blessing His name. Why are we thankful to Him? Look at the latter half of the passage - we're thankful to Him for His goodness and His everlasting lovingkindness (mercy) and faithfulness. (Side note: as I write this, I am listening to How Great Thou Art. It's cool writing about His goodness, lovingkindness, and faithfulness-just three reasons He is so great-while listening to this hymn!) This shows me something else important - because we are thankful for who He is, we can be thankful in any circumstance. His goodness, lovingkindness, and faithfulness are always there, never changing. Even when He is refining us through the fire, we can be thankful, because He is good, merciful, and faithful. He is such an awesome God!

Here is a list of some things I'm thankful for

(this is NOT exhaustive):

1. The fact that I am saved from my sin - though my sin is still present, it no longer has power over me
2. My awesome church families (plural because I kind of live in 3 places; therefore, 3 churches)
3. My family (immediate and extended)- as confusing as it can be to outsiders, I love it!

5. Laughter

6. Being at The Master's College

7. Studying Teacher Education - my classes have taught me SO much

8. Foundation, my college group- awesome teaching and faithful leaders

9. Sweaters, argyle socks, and scarves (can you guess what I'm wearing today?)

10. Being home for 5 nights for Thanksgiving

11. Service opportunities at church

12. My awana kids - they make me laugh and melt my heart

13. The opportunity to meet with Meredith weekly and the friendship that has come from it

14. My wing - full of loud, crazy, fun, and God-loving ladies

15. Spinach (never thought I'd say that)

16. Friends - especially those that include fellowship and fun

17. Red Velvet - cake, cupcakes, cake pops, anything

18. Being able to do laundry free at home

19. The Word of God - it truly is "a lamp to my feet (for guidance for each step I take) and a light to my path (giving me an overall picture of God's plan and the goal of it-His glory)" Psalm 119:105

20. Hymns and other music that is focused on God and on truth

21. Growing up

22. A roof over my head and food in my belly

23. Homemade white bean chili (one of those foods that makes me question why I chose a school that I would have to leave home and eat in a caf....okay not really, but I do enjoy it)

24. My small group on my wing (here's why I love it)

25. Nail polish

26. Pretty things - I have learned a lot about the value of appreciating beauty this semester

27. Banjos, ukuleles, guitars, mandolins - love listening to them

28.  Victory over sins in my life and help from the Holy Spirit

29. So many good memories

30. Good food tomorrow. Favorite T-day foods: biscuits and green been casserole!

31. The sibs - 3 sisters and 1 brother - my best friends and the funniest/funnest people I've ever met

32. Swap meets and swap meet finds

33. Early mornings before other people wake up - such a peaceful time of day that I don't see enough

34. The Valley of Vision

35. Fun

36. Taste buds. They are some of my best buds, that's for sure.

37. Seeing pictures of the snow in Maine (I think I get the better end of the deal...I see the beauty but I don't a) have to shovel the driveway, decks, or roof, b) have toes that I can't feel, c) have a frozen and runny nose...okay none of those are that bad. I'm trying to convince myself that I don't want to be there right now)

38. Things that smell good

39. Things that make me smell good

I could say so many more things that I am thankful for. Because everything that is given to me is good! Even the trials that come are good for me, because I do grow from them and afterward I always see how it is actually better that I went through them than it would have been if I didn't. I do want to clarify something though. More important than the things I am thankful for is the One I am thankful to. James 1:17 - Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. Every good thing in my life comes from my heavenly Father. He is so good.

A Couple Thoughts as of Late

God has been doing so much in my life lately. In almost every area of my life, He has pulled me and stretched me and taught me valuable things. But there are a couple things in particular that have been consistently on my mind.

• I love hearing what God has done in people's lives. I love when people tell of a way He has provided for, helped, answered prayer, reassured, saved, sanctified, taught, etc. them or someone they know. It's such an encouragement. These stories are almost always followed by an amazing truth: "God is so good." I love it. But sometimes I think, do we say that in the midst of trials? When we do not see an end of our/someone else's suffering? When God is closing a door we do not want closed? When someone or something is taken away from us? When sin is prevalent in the life of someone we deeply care about? When He says "no" or "wait" to a prayer that we expect a positive answer to? I have been convicted of this lately in my own life. It's like the phrase goes, "God is good all the time; all the time, God is good." It just seems like often people only say that when He is giving them what they want. He has given us life, salvation, forgiveness, the ability to be reconciled to Him, the ability to be seen as righteous in His sight, and provides for our needs, on top of so many things. That alone shows His goodness. He is good, even when our circumstances aren't.
• On a completely separate note, it's often hard to trust that God will provide for our needs. Do I trust Him as my provider? To say that I never fail in that area would be a (big) lie. I struggle to have faith that He will provide everything I need sometimes. Which shows that often my theology is in the "quite messed up" department. I know God will provide for every need. Sometimes I have trouble trusting in the details or in the "how" of His provision. But deep down, I really do know He will provide. Why? Because He promises to do it. He always keeps His word. If He promised to do it, He will. But as I was talking with a friend the other night, I had a realization. God will keep His word, so if He promises to provide, I can rest assured that He will. But it's more than just a promise - it's who He is. One of His names is Jehovah Jireh (the Lord provides). God does not just provide because He promised to do so. He provides because it's who He is. That just really encouraged me. (I had similar thoughts along these lines several months ago; if you want to read my post it's here.)

I could say so much more about what I've learned. But this is what I wanted to/had time to share tonight. Hopefully I'll have more time to write posts over Thanksgiving break (I leave for home TOMORROW). Enjoy your week, friends!

Small Groups

This semester, I have been reminded of one of the best parts about being here at TMC - small groups. My freshman year I was part of one and it was seriously one of the biggest blessings in my life. Last year, unfortunately, since I was so busy with classes (in the fall I had 7, in the spring, 6) at all hours of the day, 6 days a week, I was unable to participate. Even though there were two, on different days, neither semester it worked out for me to be a part of one. So, I was extremely excited to be able to join one this year.

Let me tell you...I so look forward to that time every Tuesday. Though our group is bigger than one I've been in here (10 people total, I believe), it is still small enough for everyone to be open. Or, maybe it's the fact that our wing is very open in general. Either way, we are all comfortable enough to tell things that we normally wouldn't tell so many at once. The girls are such a sweet encouragement, always.

For the last two weeks, we've begun with singing. It's awesome to sing together as a group of friends/sisters in Christ. And, it's cool to see people using their talents you did not even know they had (e.g. Bree playing guitar..never would have known otherwise). Then we share what God has been teaching us the past week, either through classes or chapel or personal time in the word or through whatever other venue He uses (and man, does He use many different kinds). After that, we dive into the Word - we are studying the "I am" statements Jesus made in John. It is so cool to see what He proclaims Himself to be, and how it was shown in the context, and how it is shown today (because He never changes).  After this, we share prayer requests or anything else on our minds. We then close in prayer, and the last couple weeks we have also gone to dinner together afterward.

Some benefits/blessings that come from small groups I've come to appreciate over the years:

• Getting to know people you would not necessarily know otherwise
• Getting to know people on a deeper level...
• ...which leads to deeper relationships
• Investing in others, who are also investing in you
• Having time set aside for conversations of eternal value
• Accountability
• Related to that, having people who will ask you about your walk with the Lord, consistency in devotions, prayer requests, struggles, etc.
• People being real. Sometimes, in passing, it's hard to be genuine. But small group is a safe place to talk about your problems and get advice from others who love the Lord and will encourage you to walk uprightly before Him
• More time studying the Word. Time in the Word with other girls. (Plus, now I'm studying Isaiah and reading Joshua for class...it's nice to be studying in the New Testament too.)
• Talking about my own struggles and sins (and having others relating to the same things) and how the Lord has worked through them with me and given me victory
• Sometimes, we have some girl time thrown in there. There are conversations we just need to have sometimes. It's good to have a time to talk with several girls, to share in one another's joys and sorrows

There is so much more I could say. I love my small group. Though at times I'm sure we're loud enough for all of Cdub to hear, it is such a sweet time of encouragement and conviction. If at all possible, I would encourage every Christian to be a part of a small group. In my opinion, it's worth any sacrifice you can make (reasonably...I wouldn't say drop a class you need for your major, for example) to be a part of one. The blessings are immense, and the rewards are eternal.